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| ( 2002-01-24 + 8:53 p.m. ) Dalai my Lama So you know what is not good? Going from an hour and a half or more of sitting here, to an hour and a half or more of watching tv sitting there, to coming straight back here to do some more sitting. Seriously do we see the correlation between why i am so fat and lazy, and my habits? No well then look harder. However this lovely time has allowed to me to think and compare my life to everything else as per usual. And i have figured that one day i will be unbelievably happy with my life. No doubt [hey baby hey baby hey] about it. Because when you have a certain someone, aka a boyfriend, that loves you just the way you are, and tells you that and you get to hang out with them and do stuff. It makes you feel on top of the world. Even if there are hard things and everything isn't fairy tale-ish. I'm sure it's damn good. Actually i sure hope it's damn good. Because if it aint, I'm going to be damn disappointed. Is it sad that i'm 17 in year 12 and never been kissed? Only when someone other than yourself tells you. But no one knows. That's the thing. Absolutely no one knows. Well except for all you who read this religiously [i wish haha]. Not even my bestest bud in the whole world [at the moment, so sorry i always have to add that]. She may have a clue, but somehow i doubt it, because well i've lied to her many a times making up boys i've kissed. Is it wrong to lie? I'm really hoping it isn't [even though I know it is], because i do it an awful lot. My whole life is a lie. I lie about stupid things, just to make my self seem better, even if they are so stupid that that is impossible. *sigh* Oh i love crazy talking happy maniac physco moods. Like I'm in now, where I could rattle on about nothing forever. I wish I was drunk and I had boyfriend right now. You would not believe now happy that would make me. *sigh* I think I better stop now, because you're all going to think I am retarded and never read me again. Ohhh lol funniest thing just happened, someone [aka Lea] asked about me and him f*cking. Oh yes. Damn I hate these type of conversations, how do I tell him that I'm not really interested at all, but I like the idea of him still liking me. Yes, because I am a deeply selfish person. Alright, so did I mention the Dalai Lama is coming here!
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n a v i g a t e : home archives rings biography profile c o n t a c t : notes gbook m o r e : cd rack | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||